


Always My Daughter

by Anxiouslykitty



Category: Star Trek: Picard, Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Gen, Gradnmother-Granddaughter Relationship, Grandmothers, Grief/Mourning, Hurt/Comfort, Mother-Daughter Relationship, Telepathy, Thad's Death
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-17
Updated: 2020-12-31
Packaged: 2021-03-10 17:08:37
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,996
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28130685
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Anxiouslykitty/pseuds/Anxiouslykitty
Summary: Lwaxana comforts Deanna after Thad dies.
Relationships: Deanna Troi & Lwaxana Troi, Lwaxana Troi & Kestra Troi-Riker
Comments: 3
Kudos: 16





	1. Chapter 1

While Lwaxana would under no circumstances consider herself old she had to admit that at her age many days of space travel left her exhausted. After years of hopping from ship to ship through her Ambassadorial duties she had retired from most of her travels five years before. She now rarely left Betazed. However, when she received the message from Will telling her that Thad had finally died she jumped on the first ship she could convince to take her from Betazed to Nepenthe. She needed to be with Deanna while she experienced the greatest loss she would ever experience again. She hadn’t been able to be there when Deanna had her child Ian and lost him and she regretted that even to this day.

It took a little bit of persuasion to find someone to bring her out to Deanna and Will’s house, but once she did some sweet talking a local man offered to bring her. In her later years the eccentricities with which she dressed had dulled some so she had packed rather light for this trip. She only wore one wig now and the days of large heavy dresses were well behind her. She still had her outgoing personality, but her outward appearance reflected a much more subdued persona. Even packing lightly she couldn’t manage her own case and the man offered to manage it for her without any further persuasion. 

She talked to the gentleman, Captain Craiton, the whole trip to Deanna’s home. She kept up one of her long stories about decades ago to keep herself busy and avoid any conversation of personal things. Captain Craiton had mentioned that he knew the Troi-Riker family and she was not in the mood to discuss their family tragedy with strangers. She was in the middle of discussing an enjoyable tale about an ambassadorial party years ago with a moderately interested Captain when an overwhelming wave of grief swept through her. She stopped her story and closed her eyes. Grabbing her head she focused on the direction that the grief was coming from.

“Are you alright ma'am” Captain Craiton asked.

It took all the effort she had to push the emotions to the side for her to be able to answer the captain. 

“Are we close” Lwaxana asked.

“Yes” he replied, glancing sideways at her periodically.

The grief hit her harder the closer they got and now she could hear crying. It had been many years since someone else's feelings and thoughts had been able to so overpower her. She was one of the most advanced telepaths of her time and even at her age she still had more skill than most. Right now though she could barely hear her own thoughts over the overpowering grief coming from Deanna. It had to be Deanna she was feeling. Only another Betazoid could send their emotions and thoughts out with such force. Although Deanna’s Kestra was a quarter Betazoid she knew she was not powerful enough to control any of her telepathy.

When the house appeared in front of them she used all of her strength to push Deanna’s emotions to one side of her mind. With part of her mind free she was able to turn some of her attention back to the Captain who was stopping in front of the house and helping her down. 

“Thank you” she stammered.

With a few unsteady steps she made her way towards the house. Will came outside and quickly met her. Without asking he offered her his arm and helped her up the steps to the house.

“Lwaxana are you alright” Will asked.

“Where is she” Lwaxana gasped.

“You’re trembling, are you sure you’re okay” Will asked.

Lwaxana looked up at Will. They hadn’t always gotten a long, but after Thad got sick they had found a way to put most of their problems aside to be there for Deanna. Will’s eyes were sad and concerned as they watched her. She could see that he wasn’t sleeping and that he had been crying. Normally she would just read his thoughts, but Deanna’s were so overwhelming that she couldn’t read anyone else in the house. It was terrifying to not be able to read Will after years of using that to communicate comfortably with him.

“Her grief is overwhelming me” Lwaxana choked out.

“How can I help” Will asked.

He was such a good man. She didn’t know why it took her so long to see that. She used to think that Deanna was making such a mistake to be in a relationship with him, but now she was glad Deanna had Will.

“Just take me to her. She needs me” Lwaxana explained. 

Will led her upstairs and Lwaxana leaned heavily on his arm. As she got closer Deanna’s thoughts became clearer and clearer. Loud cries rang through her mind from her daughter. 

“Little One” Lwaxana called out telepathically. 

The cries didn’t stop and as Will opened the door to the bedroom Lwaxana realized that the cries were no longer just telepathic. Now she could hear the sobs coming from her daughter curled up on the bed. She pushed off of Will’s arm and staggered to the bed where she climbed up and wrapped her arms around Deanna. She pulled her daughter tightly to her chest and began gently rubbing her hair and her back.

“Oh Little One” Lwaxana cooed telepathically.

Lwaxana heard Will leave the room and shut the door behind him. She tried to focus her energy solely on Deanna while keeping the overwhelming emotions coming from her daughter controlled in her own mind. She knew from experience that Deanna needed to feel the things she was experiencing, but she also knew that if Deanna didn’t regain some control then she would become lost in her grief. 

With a great deal of effort she pushed into Deanna’s mind. At first the emotions threatened to overwhelm her again, but she slowed herself and built the walls of her own mind up again. Slowly she reached out inside Deanna’s mind and began building walls for her. It had been years since she had done anything like this for someone else. As she slowly built walls to contain Deanna’s grief she began to feel her control return with more strength. She didn’t want to box away all of Deanna’s grief just enough to be able to reach her.

“Little One can you hear me” Lwaxana reached out telepathically. 

“Mother, oh mother” Deanna cried out in her mind.

Lwaxana slowly pulled out of Deanna’s mind knowing she had put enough walls up that Deanna would be less overwhelmed by her emotions. She wanted to take all of Deanna’s pain, but she knew it wouldn’t be what was best for her in the end. 

“Deanna, I’m here now” Lwaxana voiced.

“Mother” Deanna sobbed. “Mother it hurts so much.”

“I know Little One” Lwaxana comforted.

“Please, please take it away,” Deanna begged. “Take away the pain mother please.”

Hearing Deanna beg her broke Lwaxana’s heart. It was a mother’s job to keep their children from suffering. Now her daughter was begging her for help and she knew that she couldn’t help her the way she wanted. She wanted to cry herself, but she held the tears in. She pushed her heartbreak to a small portion of her mind so Deanna wouldn’t feel it.

“I can’t take away the pain,” Lwaxana explained. “You have to feel it to survive this. You can’t do what I did. You can’t push it all away.”

Deanna let out a new round of heart shattering sobs and gripped the fabric of Lwaxana’s outfit. Deana buried her face in Lwaxana’s chest. The tears seeped through the fabric on her chest. She held Deanna tighter and kissed the top of her head.

“You’ll get through this Little One” Lwaxana encouraged. “You’re stronger than me. We’ll get through this together I promise.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lwaxana comforts Kestra and opens up to Deanna.

Three weeks of helping Deanna to cope with the loss of her son had taken its toll on Lwaxana. They had made great progress and Deanna had now been able to take down most of the mental walls that Lwaxana had put up for her the first day she was here. However there were still days where Deanna lost control of her emotions and they lashed out at Lwaxana. Today has been one of those days. That morning Deanna had woken from a nightmare and screamed out both telepathically and verbally. Will had been with her first which stopped the audible screaming, but Deanna’s mind was out of control. She screamed and cried and the feelings of grief ripped through her mind. Lwaxana had had to go into Deanna’s mind and put up the last wall they had taken down to calm her.

Afterwards Deanna had gone back to sleep and Lwaxana had gone down stairs to get something to eat. She only made it to the couch before needing to sit down and rest. She thought she had only laid down for a second, but soon she was sound asleep. Her dreams were closer to nightmares and the thoughts that passed through her mind were not entirely her own. One of the problems of going into someone else’s mind was that it created a small link that strengthened the connection between the two minds. She and Deanna already had a strong telepathic link, but now it was common for thoughts in Deanna’s head to trail freely into her own. Luckily Lwaxana was in control of her own mind that her thoughts did not travel to Deanna.

Slowly she opened her eyes as she felt the presence of another close to her. After the first few days of strong emotions she had been able to regain her own mind enough to read the others in the house again. She had been relieved when she heard the first annoyed statement from Will’s mind. She had never been a fan of not being able to read people so those few days had been difficult for her. Now though she could tell who was there with her before she opened her eyes all the way.

“Hello Kestra” Lwaxana greeted.

“Hello Grandmother” Kestra replied.

The little girl was kneeling next to the couch and staring at Lwaxana from only a few inches in front of her face. At first she had found it unsettling how quiet the child was. It had been many years since she had seen her and had not remembered her being quite so peculiar. As the days had gone by though she realized that Kestra was just trying to fit in with what she noticed of her mother and grandmother. Often Lwaxana and Deanna would sit quietly inches from each other. What Kestra obviously didn’t understand was that they were communicating telepathically. Kestra probably didn’t realize that they were talking and thought that they were just being close with each other. It saddened Lwaxana that she had taken so long to realize that the girl only wanted to feel the connection that she and Deanna had.

“Why do you sit so close to my face” Lwaxana asked, testing her theory.

The little girl looked a little nervous, but mostly quizzical. She looked as if the question confused her and she was trying to think of what she had done wrong. Lwaxana tried to not read Kestra’s mind because she wanted to allow the child to feel and think freely.

“Should I not,” Kestra asked. “You and mom do this.”

“You’re not doing anything wrong,” Lwaxana consoled. “Do you know why your mother and I sit so quietly together for so long?”

Kestra shook her head.

“We are communicating telepathically” Lwaxana explained. “We are communicating with our minds. Normally you wouldn’t even notice when we were communicating, but because your mother is so tired and emotional it takes her a lot more energy to communicate and it’s easier for her and I if we sit calmly while we talk. The reason we are so close is because we love each other and the closeness allows us to support each other.”

“Can you and I communicate telepathically” Kestra asked.

“No honey I don’t think we can,” Lwaxana explained. “You’re only a quarter Betazoid and I don’t think you inherited enough telepathic abilities. Even your mother isn’t a full telepath. But you’re still young.”

Sadness washed over the little girl so strongly that Lwaxana couldn’t help read her thoughts. She was so lonely and sad and she missed her brother terribly. All she wanted was her mother to hold her and talk to her.

“Kestra come here” Lwaxana instructed, opening her arms to the child. “Come here and lie with me.”

Lwaxana shifted a bit on the couch and Kestra climbed up. She helped Kestra lay down on her and snuggle into her chest. Lwaxana wrapped her arms around the child and held her as tightly as she could. The little girl melted into Lwaxana’s body and her mind washed with sadness and contentment. Lwaxana focused on Kestra’s mind and sent warm comforting thoughts through the child’s mind. She couldn’t do what she did for Deanna, but she hoped that she might be able to at least provide her some comfort.

“Do you feel that” Lwaxana asked.

“What’ Kestra asked.

“The feeling in your mind of peace and love” Lwaxana asked.

Kestra had to think for a minute and she fidgeted closer and held tighter to Lwaxana.

“Yes” Kestra replied.

“Those are my thoughts that I am sending to you. You may not be able to communicate with me the way your mother does, but that doesn’t mean I can’t comfort you the way I do her” Lwaxana explained.

As they laid there Lwaxana could feel Kestra become more and more relaxed. The thoughts in her mind slowed and soon she was asleep. Lwaxana was tired, but she didn’t want to sleep again so she just laid there and gently rubbed Kestra’s back as she slept.

“ _Mother_ ” Deanna reached out telepathically.

“ _I am downstairs Little One. Come to me_ ” Lwaxana called back.

Lwaxana waited to hear Deanna’s footsteps on the stairs. It was several minutes before she did and she watched to see when she would be in view. When she did come into view she looked tired and she had puffy eyes from crying as much as she did. It had been a couple days since the last time Deanna had cried that much and it hurt Lwaxana to see her so broken again. 

“There’s so much sadness” Deanna said as she knelt on the floor in front of her mother.

Lwaxana removed her hand from Kestra and reached it out to run it along the side of Deanna’s face. 

“I know you are sad dear. You have every right to be, but you will get through this” Lwaxana encouraged.

“No, I can feel her sadness and I can feel your sadness” Deanna explained.

This was the first time since she had arrived that Deanna had mentioned anything about regaining her abilities. Her own emotions had been so overwhelming that Deanna hadn’t been able to read anyone's emotions. It made Lwaxana happy to know that it really was working and her daughter really was coming back, but it also hurt her to realize all that she would be able to read on them was sadness. 

“Little One” Lwaxana cooed as she put up a wall in her mind to keep Deanna out.

“No mother please don’t” Deanna pleaded. “Don’t shut me out. I don’t want you to protect me from it. I need to feel your emotions and Kestra’s and Will’s. I need to remember who I am.”

Reluctantly Lwaxana took down the wall letting Deanna in.

“Will you take down the others” Deanna asked gently.

Lwaxana hesitated. She had put up a wall in her mind around her true feelings about Thad’s death and how much it hurt her to see Deanna in pain. She had wanted to ensure that these emotions didn’t prevent her from helping Deanna heal. She figured once she had gotten Deanna better again she would be able to deal with her own emotions when she got home.

“ _Please mother_ ” Deanne said telepathically.

Slowly Lwaxana pulled down the last wall in her mind and let the thoughts, memories, and emotions wash over her. It was overwhelming at first causing tears to spring to her eyes and rush down her face. She tightened her one arm around Kestra and brought her free hand to cover her face while she breathed deeply. After a minute she lowered her hand and looked at Deanna. Tears streamed down Deanna’s face.

“Oh mother” Deanne sobbed.

Lwaxanna opened her free arm to Deanna who leaned forward and rested her head on Lwaxana’s chest next to Kestra. Lwaxana wrapped her arm tightly around Deanna’s back and held her to her. Deanne hand one arm draped across Kestra who was still sleeping and the other gripped onto Lwaxana’s shoulder. Having the full weight of her granddaughter laying on top of her plus the weight of Deanna’s upper body draped on her was a bit much, but she pushed it away to focus on the love she felt. 

Deanna cried and Lwaxana cried and Kestra slept. Three generations of Troi women comforting each other through tremendous heartbreak. Will watched from the corner of the room and felt tears of his own slip down his face. He had wanted to be the one to take away Deanna and Kestra’s pain, but he knew he had been right to call Lwaxana. She hadn’t taken their pain away she had just shown them how to live through it. He quietly slipped out of the room and returned with a holo imager and took a quick picture of the three on the couch. He didn’t know when he would show the picture to them, but he thought that one day Deanna would be thankful she had it.


End file.
